Mud Pies & Minivans: Common Courtesy

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Common Courtesy

There are those rare kids who are "lucky" enough to kind of have a naturally tender heart & compassion towards others, but common courtesy is something that we as parents usually have to not only instill in our children but model in our own behavior as well. I believe I wrote about something along these lines a lil' while back classified as "compassion", but every day I see more & more how important it is & how less & less common it is becoming in the kids of today.

Recently, we went to 1 of the girls' friend's birthday party. They had a bounce house & there were mixed ages bouncing around in there. Some of the older kids you could see making a conscious effort to bounce more gently while some of the other kids could careless & just kept bouncing around wildly. Could we make excuses? Absolutely. Older kids who tend to be around younger kids/siblings more often are going to naturally be more gentle or you could make the excuse that girls are just more gentle than boys. BUT why is that okay? Why settle with excuses? I want my kids to stand out from the norm in a good way, doesn't every parent?

During pinata time 1 kid rushed in early & got hit with the bat, some kids cared while other kids were just concerned about the candy & toys. I definitely took this as a wonderful opportunity to step in & teach my girls something. There are always situations that present themselves that we can use to teach our kids valuable lessons if we are looking for them. First,I let my kids grab a few pieces of candy for themselves (I try to teach them with pinatas to save some for their friends) & then I suggested they grab some for the lil' boy who didn't get any because he was inside getting ice for his injury. The boy was extremely grateful & my girls once again got the opportunity to see its not all about them.

During present time is also a great opportunity to encourage common courtesy. Are kids need to sit still & give the birthday child their undivided attention because its good manners & right. Is it going to be more tough for a 1 year old to sit still as opposed to a 6 or 7 year old? Absolutely. But it is not too early to start training & striving for the ultimate goal of them making it through the whole time opening presents without fidgeting or complaining. We also can take this time to teach our kids to be happy for others even if the birthday child received a gift they might have wanted or already have. We can teach them to keep those unnecessary comments to themselves as common courtesy & just being respectful to others.

After it is time for a child to leave a party, expressing ones' gratitude for being invited seems like the obvious thing to do, but still not everyone does it. I am sure adults verbally thank the host, but why can't we have our kids say it as well? Its a privileged to be invited somewhere that they should not take lightly. It is not something "owed".

There are so many things we need to teach our children & it can seem a lil' daunting at times, but just take on each situation as it comes. While our kids are young it definitely seems like we are constantly correcting for something, but if we are willing to put in the time while they are young then there will be less work as they get older. You will see results, hang in there & don't just let things slide. You are not alone :)

-M&M Momma