Monday, June 17, 2013

The Finicky Child

Of course all kids are going to test the boundaries of what they want versus what you say, its in their nature. But I also do believe that with some kids will have the tendency to try & be more finicky than others & it is important for us to recognize it & nip it in the bud as early as possible.

With each 1 of my kids I have always put a strong emphasize on the importance of vegetables in their diets. So once it was time to introduce baby food, I followed all of the "rules" & made sure to introduce the veggies first before adding in all the other stuff. With Aidann, it was so easy. She has never even tried to be a picky eater & loves her veggies like no other. So yes, I thought I had it figured out & then along came Asher. We did the same things & she too loved her veggies, but then once we moved on to vegetables now having texture to them, she decided that she no longer "wanted" to eat them. It was a true battle to get her to eat those peas & enjoy her salad without trying to spit it out. There would be times we could have so easily given in & taken the easy road out, but I did not want a picky eater. Those vegetables continued to make an appearance on her plate every lunch, dinner, & snack time & would be eaten. It took a while, but that tiny 1 year old soon discovered mommy & daddy were not playing & she needed to eat her vegetables whether she saw the value in eating them yet or not. So now, I must have this whole eating thing figured out right? Or so I thought. Austin is the sweetest lil' thing, but we recognized in her very early that she really truly believed that her way was the right way in all things.

The whole vegetables with texture thing was a hurdle we definitely had to overcome with her, even today from time to time she will try to test if that "you will eat your vegetables" rule is still in place & she is 2 1/2 already. With our Rose, there were also other things she tried to be very "particular" about. When it was time for bed, she would like to only wear "hot dog" (minnie mouse) pajamas or "ribbit" pajamas. When it came to going out, there were only certain shoes she wanted to wear. She always wanted to take her favorite toys with her in the van even if we said otherwise. When it came to getting dressed, she knew what she wanted to wear & did not like anything that could be thought of as itchy or uncomfortable. She also would prefer to take naps only when she deemed them necessary. Now, I guarantee in the short run it would make my husband & I's life so much easier if we catered to her every whim, but the fact of the matter is that I would not be doing her any real favors or ourselves in the long run.

I am responsible for teaching her to submit under authority & I do know what is best for her whether she believes it all the time or not. Yes, you may not feel like taking a nap or sharing, but they are going to happen. You need a nap & sharing is not an option. What kind of character/person would I be creating if I let her think that everyone in life needs to just cater to her? It is not reality & I guarantee she would not be the type of person who is stable, can hold down a job, healthy, hardworking, or compassionate towards others. Some things in life we need to do whether we feel like it or not.

At this time in life where she is learning to understand these principles, there are some times of conflict where I need to step in & discipline, but she has come such a long way & will continue progressing if my husband & I just stick with it. Its easy to rest on the excuses like "Well, they are just a kid & what can it hurt?", but the reality of the matter is that it can hurt a lot. Training up a child starts SO much earlier than we think. From the early stages of spitting out food on purpose, throwing themselves back to express disagreement, testing & throwing things even after you have told them "no"-These are the early things. Having kids is a ton of work, especially the more you add in the mix, but it is also the most rewarding thing in life that I have ever had the pleasure & absolute honor of experiencing.

That lil' girl is the most happy & sunshine-filled kiddo ever. As much as she dislikes it at times when I don't just bow to her way, she craves the love/structure/consistency. She has such great potential in life & I would be doing her a huge disservice if I did not do everything I can to help guide her to achieving it! So, Parents. Stay strong & stay on it. You can do this!

-M&M Momma





Someone loves their Gymboree
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Her cheerleaders

Caught a bubble!





















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