On to tonight's topic. While I was getting the bags packed up for swimming Aidann dived to hug Asher & they both ended up falling over right into baby Austin. All 3 of them were hurt & simulateously started crying. Jay swooped up the bigger girls to comfort while I checked on lil' Aussie. They all were perfectly fine & I went back to packing. Aidann then came over to me & very sincerely stated, "Mommy, I knocked down Asher & Aussie on accident so I don't get a spanken". I replied back reassuring her that she was right, accidents do happen, but we also need to do our best to try & be careful.
I think it is almost vital as parents to be careful about how we choose to react when our children make a mistakes. As parents what we do carries a huge weight & will have long lasting effects that our children will carry with them into their future & other relationships later on. We can create great insecurities & children who are more on edge if when they accidentally spill a glass of milk we get angry & scream. That child will probably tend to try & hide/cover up when they make a bad decision or do something wrong instead of feeling comfortable to open up & talk about it honestly.
Kids are kids & they are definitely going to make mistakes, probably a lot of them in those very very early years. They just don't think things through clearly when they are lil', cause & effect is still a very foreign concept. So lets say your child gets a hold of some teal nail polish & decides to paint various objects around the room instead of laying down to sleep..... (Previous post "Teal Nails, Spaghettios, & Popsicles" lol), instead of immediately resorting to yelling & getting extremely angry with them, we have to realize they are just a kid. We have to make the steps towards teaching them to think things through. Like with Aidann knocking her lil' sisters over, I did want to get angry, but I had to stop myself & realize her heart was right. She was just trying to hug Ashy & didn't think about how the 22 pounder would just fly over like that. She didn't think about how her baby sister was right there on the floor & could potentially get hit pretty hard if 1 of them was to fall over on her. I AM NOT saying if you have told your kid a thousand times not to do something & they choose to do it anyway not to discipline them-THAT is a whole different story. I am talking about genuine accidents.
We want our kids to realize that everyone makes mistakes & that is okay, it is what you do after the mistake that matters. Do you give up? Pout? Get angry? Or do you learn from up? Admit it? Brush yourself off? Try harder next time? You especially have to work with those kids who tend to be perfectionists & beat up on themselves over every tiny lil' thing ( ME! ME! ME!).
-M&M Momma
P.S. There is some really great kid literature out there to teach your kids about making mistakes & a really good song by Big Bird that Aidann just loves (my lil' perfectionist). I believe its called "Everyone Makes Mistakes".
Aidy & her buddy Starla |
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